Old Miles (Edited)

Dark miles written, paraded,
a spectral electric dealer
in protocol.

An ominous amputation-
film at 11.

Hopelessly lounging in basements
as colossal boxcars journey their
live-wire joyrides on the peripheral of
what I can still detect.

They were arranged in the pale
light of a factory,
postmortem.

* * *

Edited after today’s workshopping. I appreciate everyone’s comments. I enjoyed today’s Writer’s meeting immensely. It had been too long. I’ve missed the people, the Chicory’s coffee…I appreciate Charmi’s lash-wielding, Rachel’s persistence to attend despite illness, and Naoko’s extremely thoughtful and wholly unexpected gift. Some days you people make it worthwhile.

Just sayin’.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Old Miles (Edited)”

  1. The edit is very good.

    I had a great time at The Chicory yesterday, too. There is really an energy building. I don’t think my lash wielding was very effective, though, more for show, I think.

  2. You could always hire an au pair…ok, I really just wanted a chance to use “au pair” in a sentence. I don’t know why, I just heard it the other day on T.V. and was reminded that I like it.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s